An Ode to Hostile Wednesdays

Top Reasons to Leave Hostile Wednesdays the Way they Were Found:

• Bitterness is contagious, like mono. And I have both.
• Litotes rules, but bad stuff really isn't all that nice. (BTW, litotes is the English Lit term for understandment [**understatement, sorry.]. English kids are nerdy. Sorry, I just can't stop.)
• Throwing things is fun.
• My pouty face is the cutest face I can make.
• Hostile Wednesdays are the driving force behind this blog, and bitterness is the driving force behind my life.
• I have no solution to the sound of this pollution in me. But whatta you got to move you darlin'? (you should answer: why, you, of course!)

Top Reasons NOT to Change Hostile Wednesdays

• I will have fewer opportunities to threaten to defenetre everything you own.
• I will have fewer reasons to threaten people in general.
• This stuff has got to come out somehow...
• It's my favourite day to listen to Goo.
• If I'm gonna vent about the deflowering of innocent young males at strip clubs, or the generally idiocy of the opposite sex, wouldn't you rather I get it all off my chest once every week than once every hour?
• You love the pout.
• It's the only day that listening to depressing and angry music is truly acceptable.

This one fits both headings, and obviously there's some overlap it just depends on whether you like the word "not" or...well, you know--

If I'm not hostile on Wednesdays, I will be hostile all the time. That's right: ALL THE TIME.

So quit bringing me real things to be upset about and let me get back to my rant about bus drivers and my general dislike for people. Oh, that's an order.