A Post For Jean

This entry is actually dedicated to Jean, Chief Dog, and the guy across the street. I'm sorry I ain't there with you but you ain't here with me.

I was walking around campus just the other day, and a saw a yellow fire hydrant that said "Darling" on it, and I thought of you...

Remember that time we drove all over Burlington AND Hamilton yelling at the fire hydrants because they were so inconsistent? Some are red and yellow, and some are red and blue! It's madness.

I was wondering through the mall, looking in the windows of the stores, and I saw the most beautiful white gown...

Remember that time that we went to the mall and bought a disposable camera and tried on dresses that looked like wedding gowns to freak our boyfriends out? Do you remember how excited Shane was that I wanted to get married? Do you remember when the lady wanted to know what we were doing you told her we just had really bad memories?

And I was at the Dairy Queen the other night, eating a blizzard and thinking...

Remember that time we drove all over Oakville looking for the place I needed to go to get my Health Card back and we ended up across the street from a Dairy Queen? I was so exasperated by the driving ordeal that I said, "No, Jean. We can't go to Dairy Queen right now. I'll take you tomorrow." And you started to cry!

That said, here are the reasons why I love you, Jean (Note: I do not love Ugene.)

• We are two hot girls in a mustang, so we get free drinks at Second Cup.
• You introduced me to Second Cup. We were in Toronto and somebody thought caffeine was a good idea for the ride home. I was bouncing in my seat the whole ride back.
• When I sneeze you say, "That's just not safe!" regardless of whether I'm driving or not.
• You have an amazing ability to make the ordinary, extraordinary. Think: Trips to Walmart and impulse buys at the counter. I really needed that best of Friends DVD. Really.
• When I come to pick you up to go somewhere, you always get in the car and launch right into a story. You never ever say hello to me.
• You helped me nurse my ailing roommate back to health.
• You were so polite to those Rez Staffers when my roommate was ailing (and didn't know her own name, poor girl) and when they were out of earshot you screamed at me because all she needed was an orange and they should just let you give her an orange!
• You forgave me for eating the shrimp. (Now it's in writing so you can't deny it!)
• You let Shane sleep on your couch for a whole summer because he wasn't allowed to stay at my house when I was home alone. I hear you even made him breakfast. Fancy.
• You drove all the way to London to pick me up on a Thursday night because I wanted to come home. You drove 160 km/hour the whole way because that way you knew you'd get here in an hour and not have to do any math to figure that out.
• You came with me on my first trip to Toronto in my Mazda because I was afraid I'd get lost. You were absolutely no help at all, but I enjoyed the company.
• We both gave Jeff the same exact look when he offered to help me move out of rez last year. It was a cross between pure disbelief and absolute horror. What was happening to our safe, predictable world?
• When I sing Goo Goo Dolls like this : "You and I got something but it's all and then it's nothing to meYEA....yea" you don't even notice any more because you are doing the exact same thing.
• You took me to the Mandarin for Crabfest. I will make you a blanket a day if you will keep doing that.
• When I call your house I can't tell whether I'm talking to you or your mom. When it's your mom she lets me prattle on for a few minutes about last night's drunken stupor and then says, "Well, it's nice to hear from you, Erin. But Jean isn't here right now."'
• The way that you explain my behaviour to other people makes me sound so much cooler than it actually is. "When Erin's drunk you can get her to do anything! I love it. What sound does a fire truck make, Erin?" You're a loser. That ice cream made me sick.
• To you, my stories only get better with use.
• When I'm really excited about something, you are convinced it's all your doing.
• It usually is all your doing.
• You went to the movies I refused to see with Shane while I was working.
• You tell the most impossibly unbelievable stories I've ever heard. Snake? Eating a kangaroo? Pfft...yea.
• You are the second in command Weinist. If I died, you would be Wein, Jean.
• No one else on Earth understands my bitterness the way you do. You have seen it in action.
• You eventually took a picture of that bus stop ad that said "Standing up for advertising standards" as it turned yellow and got all crumpled in the bottom corner.
• When I said I wanted to listen to the elephant song from Legault's french class you found it, downloaded it, and burned it onto a CD for our road trip to London. I listened to it in the car with my Dad on the way to Ottawa. He can whistle the whole song now. "Panique! A la maison. Il y a un elephant sur mon balcon!"
• You just laughed when I took my (now X) boyfriend's best friend to the All-Stars hockey thing in Toronto instead of my (now X) boyfriend. He said he had to work
• You know exactly what I'm doing when I'm on the phone with you even though you can't see me. It's uncanny.
• The look on your face when I said Dad gave Jeff the VIP tickets to some car thing.
• That day we went into talk to my boss at Fortinos you made my life so much harder. We were pinpricks, like this, remember? The next time I worked with him, he was like, "I had no idea you were so outgoing."
• You give me Riesens to live.

Look at the size of that list...and I could go on. In fact, I came back and added to it. But Jean, the number one reason why I love you is because this entry was ALL your idea. You're so modest.