The Sountrack of My Life

After a few drinks, you become sure that some sinister composer has written half a dozen songs that represent each episode of your life--and you're not even being compensated for it. I'd like to take it one step further: these are all the songs that make up the soundrack of my life:

1. "Anthem for the Already Defeated": for the nights my friends can't make it to where I am (so long as I am in London and they are too cheap to take the train). Don't worry though, Rory. This way we dont have to worry about locking our eyes forever, because that would mean we are in love. I'll just shake my rump alone.
2. "Stay with You". This is the song they will play at our reception when Shane and I are reintroduced as the McGinnes (pluralize that how you will)-- "I'll stay with you. The walls will fall before we do." Now we just need to find some reception walls that look cheap; if they fall at the reception there's no pressure on our marriage from there on out. Sounds like something that would happen to us--freak hurricane blows off Lake Ontario and destroys a single wedding hall. Perfect.
3. "Lips of an Angel," by Hinder. Not because I like it. Not because it has any bearing on me life. Because I hear it everywhere I go. Everywhere.
4. "Chicago" from the "Little Miss Sunshine" movie. I would totally drive to Chicago for the sake of a new love. And if you see me crying, in the van, with my friends, it is almost always for freedom. Plus I freaking love that movie.
5. "Cold Hard Bitch." There is no stretch here. I'm sure you can make the connection on your own.
6. Sarah Silverman's song from "Jesus is Magic". One of them anyway. I read an article the other day that said she was only funny because she was a chick that acted like a man (wow, Times, way to perpetuate stereotypes--good work) and I thought (loudly and to everyone in the GM waiting room), "No way, she is hilarious because she inspired me to create a painting for Rory that reminded him not to fuck children because it is against the law." And screw Times...the reason that women aren't funny to young men is because young men are stupid. Women are more subtle. Men have no sense of humour. I, for the record, am goddamn hilarious.
7. Which brings me to my next point. "Absence of God" another of Rory's favourites that was clearly written with me in mind. Because I'm not happy but I'm funny. Line of my life. Or so I am told.
8. Any song by the Spice Girls but particularly "Spice up Your Life" or "Wannabe" because those songs are on Shane's ipod and I don't think I will ever escape them. Ever.
9. "Unwell." Shane has music on the brain. I called him to tell him that we won a free trip to Florida and a cruise through the Bahamas for the low low price of $798 and whatever is left of our sanity and he said, "Don't worry, honey. You're not crazy you're just a little unwell." To which I muttered, "Too bad right now you can't tell." We're the coolest.
10. "No Children." It's just kind of what I hope for in my life. I really do hope I cut myself shaving tomorrow and I hope it will bleed all day long (the last time I hoped that I sliced a big chunk out of my armpit and spent the day, not checking to see if it was still bleeding, but terrified that Ford dirt would infest it and I would have to have my whole arm amputated.) More than that, I hope you die.