The Rules of Weinism

These rules were created during grade 12 sociology, and presented to me as a 20th birthday gift by my second in command. Here they are, the fundamentals of my proverbial religion (oh, religions themselves CAN be proverbial):

• Dodge all Dodges.
• Wein owns life.
• Practise ultimate independance: We don't need no body to be happy! (Or basic grammar for that matter)
• Jean is wrong if she's arguing with Wein.
• Jean is second in command.
• Don't listen if you don't want to hear it...run away! Screaming obscenities! AHHHHHH!
• Welch's grape juice does taste like there's a party in my mouth and only the people I invite are allowed to come.
• One hour is "2 minutes" long by other international standards (this must be observed on Wein Day). What this means is essentially there is such thing as a long day. Every day but Wein Day is long because Wein Day is so awesome.
• If you run out of space, make more!
• Convert others to Weinism like there is no tomorrow.
• There is no tomorrow.
• All Danishes should be stabbed repeatedly with a rusty fork.
• Vector bars have an unseen magnetic attraction to Dodge vehicles.
• Saturn vehicles CAN dent! The drivers are clueless and we should avoid all contact.
• In fact, let's make an island for only Saturn and Dodge drivers, and they can hit eachother and we will be safe.
• Christmas lights are for Christmas...NOT Groundhog Day.
• Fist shaking is always necessary.
• Kyle's house should be egged once every hour.
• We are all nermal.
• Incredibly nermal.
• YOU BETTER READ THIS!

And remember, "History is like a hand holding a pen, writing itself in the books of time." Now that's deep.

I'm killing myself from the inside out, and all your fears have pushed me out.--Goo