The Things You Do for Love

King Saul fell on his sword when it all went wrong, and Jacob's brothers sold him down the river for a song; Something something about tiger balm into his glove...Some things you do for money, and some you do for love love love.

Ten things I learned today. A la maniere de Wallace Stevens...a la maniere de GEC:

1. Everything's classier in French: He tried to woo me in the language of romance. You stood between us, my savior in a muscle shirt who had no love for me. He loved my ass while you praised my assets. Brilliant despite all obstacles. The French have a way of fucking everything up. French Brady curses Jim, makes me drop everything and run for sanity.
2. The lucrative effects of Canadian Whiskey: I make up new words like "lucrativity" and think I’m a genius. The stuff that loosens lips above and below. It makes me feel invincible, not invisible like rum. Thoughts slide around: like marbles on tile, oil on water, the ice cubes I dropped on the linoleum.
3. I could be in love with you: but you're always too fucking far away.
4. You could be in love with anyone.
5. Positive thinking: I'm positive--the worst is yet to come. You're positive--this is as bad as it could ever get.
6. Destructive drinking: Like I didn't know all about that before. I learned to love alliteration and words that start with "B". Searching for a word to make you proud, I fall short when I fall asleep at "aardvark".
7. I'm closer to where I started: She told me that song lyrics are a wealth of inspiration, looking seriously thoughtful...and seriously hammered.
8. You're farther away than ever before: I'll never be the same again because of your dewy eyes and hyperbole.
9. I'm the reason I hate people. [Sidebar: one of Erin and Brady's first conversations ever recorded. Erin: You're like my arch-nemesis. Everything I'm not-- I think you might just be the reason I hate people." Brady: "You're short." ] I'm bitter and unforgivable. You're happy without reprieve.
10. You were right all along: Fate sets out to set me back, and I wish I could do something to make you realize that despite your melodramatic, overactive lack of wisdom, I know full well that you were right and I was wrong.